Dear Diary, can’t talk, gotta go, bye.
1. First of all, many of us wrote about our lives to Dear Dairy, patron saint of milk and teenage secrets.
2. Who to go to the dance with. WHY YOU GOT NO ANSWERS, DAIRY?
“One day Chris B. asked me to the dance. I might go I might not.”
3. How much you hated your mother/brother/sister/father/the whole goddamned world.
4. What day it was and how sorry you were you couldn’t write more.
“Today is Jan 1 (?) 1994. Sorrey I havf to go!!”
5. A list of all your BFFs, edited to reflect those who were dead to you.
“All my homies.”
6. Any ~scandalous~ discoveries you made, which were BIG NEWS.
“Dear Diary today I learned my 1st curse word bitch.”
“Dear Diary bitch.”
“Dear Diary I just learned the f word it is fuck.”
7. Crucial declarations such as this:
8. Dumb poems.
“Roses are red, vilet are green, I can’t kiss you your as big as a washingmachine.”
9. And DEEP poems, or “pomes.”
“WHERES MY LOVE
She is cutting my hair,
I’m waiting on the chair
Wheres my love,
Waiting from above”
10. A list of all the celebrities you were going to bone.
11. And a list of all your dead and living pets.
“My old, dead, new & alive kitties”
12. The mysteries of life.
“After I lost my ball and I got it back the air was comeing out. No one know how the ball is losing air. But beleve me the air is not comeing out by a hole.”
13. Which teachers you liked and which you didn’t. Important for you records.
14. When a crush said THINGS (any things) to you.
“Today a boy I like talked to me even more than normal.”
15. Brief but important accounts of things gone wrong.
“Today I tried to wash the cat But it turned out to be a desaster.”
16. Your popularity status. And pens.
“It’s been over 2 months since I’ve written I got straight A’s and I’m kinda popular. I will now write in this pen.”
17. Philosophical reflections on the world’s tragedies. Or just the first thing that came to mind to take up pages and make it seem like you wrote more in your diary than you actually did.
“Why did geri want to quite [“quit”] the spice girls”